I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
