airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
