Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
