Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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