I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Randomize
