I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Randomize
