Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Randomize
