Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize
