The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
There was a lot of him and a little penis
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
