How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
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