What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
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