how do flat chested girls get laid?
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
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