Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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