We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Randomize