Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
