Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
My penis needs a shock collar
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
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