As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
