We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Randomize
