What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
