I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
