He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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