You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I could fuck to npr.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Randomize
