So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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