Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
