Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
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