careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
