Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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