Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Randomize
