How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
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