I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
