New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Randomize
