There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
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