Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I need moral support for this bender
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
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