So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
