So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
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