I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Randomize
