so that wasnt chicken after all
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
