I'm lost and stupid without you.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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