i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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