i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize
