Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
