I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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