i just had sex bonerless
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
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