Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
My pussy is not your playground.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Randomize
