Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize
