Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize