Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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