Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
