do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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