That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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